It's Not Me, It's You...

...well, maybe it's me a little.

Here's the thing: I used to love football. I lived for Sunday¹ and spending the day watching guys in bright helmets run around the gridiron all day. I would bury myself in the draft every spring. I didn't miss a playoff game. Football. The pigskin. A man's² game. I didn't come to it as early as I came to hockey, basketball, or baseball, but darn it if I didn't fall in love with it. Monday Night Football! Brilliant! Heck, when the Browns left Cleveland, I didn't even miss a beat, adopting the Carolina Panthers in the meantime. When the Browns returned, I felt the excitement and decided I needed to be a part of that.

And it was fun, even watching the Brownies lose week after week. Baseball had become boring and the Penguins were so bad, it was painful³. But football was always there!

I'm not sure when things started to turn. I think it was when a player for the Eagles died and even though he was in his 40s, he took so much abuse he had the brain of a man twice his age. Maybe it was when Jerome Bettis said he felt like the game took years off his life. I started to think. Around that time, it seemed like every other player in the NFL was sustaining some horrible injury. What was I watching, exactly? These guys, insane athletes, were crashing into each other with violent force hundreds of times a game. They were quite literally killing themselves one play at a time. When you realize that, it's not a whole lot of fun to watch.

Plus, the NFL comes out with all these rules about celebrations. It's dumb. It's a game, guys. If Chad Johnson wants to do a riverdance, let him. I enjoy watching it. And lest we forget, we're supposed to be enjoying ourselves, right? Right? I suppose these rules stem from the general arrogance that comes from the game these days. Football demands you follow it. It is the “greatest sport in the galaxy,” and that should be enough for you, as one executive put it. Tell someone you don't like football⁴. See if they keep talking to you. It's crazy.

Eventually, I realized that these guys are killing each other for what amounts to a game that is actually pretty lame. Think about it: They huddle for 30 seconds, run a play for about four seconds, then huddle up again. It's so slow. Then there is timeout after timeout after timeout. What's so fun about it?

I think what kept me going was my devotion to the Browns I liked being a part of a fanbase so passionate, so devoted. These people filled the stadium even in terrible seasons. I never liked college football⁵. It's like pro football, only played incompetently. However, my general ambivalence toward the sport started to chip away at my fandom. When “fans” cheered Derek Anderson getting hurt, that was it for me. I turned my card in. The Browns got crushed by the Titans this week, and I didn't even care. That's it.

Even fantasy football, because of the prevalence of injuries, has become unfun to play. I love fantasy sports⁶, so this depresses me. I don't know how much longer I can stick that out.

So that's it. Me, not a football fan. We'll see how I do beyond the pale.

______________________________________________________________________________________

1 Aside from going to church. I love going to church.

2 Incidentally, some of the toughest and scariest athletes I know are women. Don't mess with a rugby player.

3 Seriously, it was an insult to hockey and it makes this current run all the more enjoyable.

4 Also tell that person you think it's ironic that a country that values personal freedom so much also loves a game that exudes classic communist traits. That's fun.

5 Why do I attend so many OU games? You tell me. It must be a sense of obligation... and the 110. They weren't there for the Akron game, and I wasn't either.

6 I'm one of those guys that would rather have my fantasy team win than my pro team win. Why? Because it's my team! I'm actually involved!

Maybe I'm Out of Touch...

Now, I realize I'm hardly the first person to say this, but I've never understood the "it's complicated" option for relationships on Facebook. I never really thought about it, but someone rather important in my life now claims this status for herself, so let's dwell on it for a moment.

Let's go over this: You aren't quite sure what to make of your... relationship... quest... thing... with what may or may not be a significant other. It's unclear what direction things are heading, and even if you know how you feel about that person, you don't know how the other person feels. You don't know if you want a commitment, you don't know if the other person wants a commitment. But you like the person- that much is evident- and you don't want to be just friends.

Not only are you cognizant of these things, but you actually admit them to the other person, and they agree. How do you have that conversation? "Hey, um, look, we're not boyfriend/girlfriend, but we're not just friends, and we haven't really decided what we are. You want to let the rest of the world in on our indecision?"

Barney Frank

You da man! In response to Obama's comment that there is only one president at a time, he said: "I'm afraid that overstates the number of presidents we have."

Haw!

Checking In

So, I had started updating this blog again with some semblance of regularity; I even had started my longish ballot post on Election Night. I didn't get to finish it right away because I was pretty busy.

And it's not like I haven't had the time or desire to post; I've had things on my mind and plenty of opportunity to opine.

The problem was, three weeks ago I dislocated my shoulder. I was at the OU/BG football game and did the giant hamster ball race at halftime. I fell during the race, and that was that. I knew immediately my joint was not where it was supposed to be. But hey, if you're gonna injure yourself, do it in front of 15,000 people, right?

I was taken out of Peden in an ambulance. If you're keeping score, I've been escorted out of The Convo by police and taken out of Peden in an ambulance. I think I'm the only person that can claim that. Now that I think about it, how many people on this Earth can even claim similar, um, achievements?

Anyway, I've been out of my sling for less than a week. I couldn't work, and typing with one hand just isn't worth it. I'm rehabbing the shoulder and trying to catch up. I also have to get going with my MAC Report Online writing; that had to be put on hold as well.

So I'll get some posts thrown up here, just not at the speed I would like, most likely. The suckiest part is that I'm in Twinsburg again for the holiday season, and my laptop's wireless modem sucks so bad it can't pick anything up at anything but close distances. We'll see how this goes.

So...

I was planning on posting my ballot today, but that's going to have to wait until tomorrow, it looks like. I simply got caught up in the whirlwind fury of this election night.

I went to Baker Center to watch the results. I didn't really want to sit this out alone, and I really wanted to see how people would react. It seemed an Obama victory was inevitable.

Watching it actually unfold, seeing him amass an impenetrable lead so quickly, was actually kind of shocking to see. I didn't anticipate how it would actually feel. And I completely underestimated how people would react. When CNN announced Obama the winner at 11:00 p.m., the auditorium erupted. Whistles, applause, cheers, hugging, high-fives, crying, chanting. It went on for several minutes. A pure wave of euphoria swept us all away. And the videos were coming in from New York, Chicago, Australia, Kenya! It was like the whole world, in that moment, was united. I never thought I'd see it. Amazing.

I am not ashamed to admit I teared up a little. Never been had I seen anything like that related to politics. Regardless of who you wanted to win, it was a pretty powerful moment. So wow. I hope we build on that.