I Think They Made a Mistake

Roger Federer is the greatest player of the Open Era. Rafael Nadal is currently the #1 player in the world and is the reigning Wimbledon and Australian Open champion, as well as the best clay courter ever.

So why do they suck so much in Virtua Tennis 3? I hope you guys fixed this for VT4.

Do Us All a Favor

I have absolutely no problem helping anyone. In fact, I am happy to do so. However, there are limits. I realize I might have been the only guy you knew at the wedding reception. I understand that there was some creepy dude hovering near you. But dragging me out on the dance floor so that you can use me as a shield against said creepy dude is not in the range of my services. Let's not make things more awkward than they need to be.

It's Like, You Know...

So, I miss you a little bit. I'm not saying I want to be with you- we're apart for a reason- but I haven't completely divested myself of feelings for you. I do enjoy talking to you, even though I find myself saying stupid things for reasons I can't explain. I've never fully been able to get a grip on myself, you know.

I wasn't sure for a while if we were going to continue to be a part of each other's lives, but we still are, and I'm glad for that. So, yeah. That's all. Just needed to say it.

McDown Under

Saw an ad on Australian TV for McDonalds. With a food purchase, you can buy a mini-board game for a dollar. Why don't we get promotions like that? I still wouldnn't eat there, but I would get one of those games. Just another reason Australia rules.

Oh, Rafa

You have a machismo I haven't seen since Razor Ramon. You have women actually screaming uncontrollably in your wake. I touched you last year and might have gotten a temporary testosterone increase.

None of that excuses this:

I don't know if it's you or Nike- I suspect Nike- but your wardrobe choices this year have been positively brutal. You don't have to go back to the pirata look if you don't want to. At least look less like some neon alien, OK?