So This is the New Year

You know, every year we get the political cartoons and platitudes of leaving the bad of the previous year behind. It was most prevalent in 2000 as we bid "goodbye" to Hitler, McVeigh, etc. We act as though because we have to buy a new calendar, it's somehow a fresh start, a clean slate. I don't get this. Nothing changes on January 1st but a number. We never leave anything behind, we don't start anew. And if we did, we never do anything with it. Look at 2001. Look at 2006. We do the same terrible, stupid, destructive things that we always have. I'm not saying a new year isn't worth celebrating, but let's not delude ourselves. The same crap happens every year.

So we started with the new quarter this week. Like I said earlier, I think I have a pretty solid slate of classes. So when I started the quarter out, I was feeling pretty good. I get to Bentley for my first class at 11, walk into the classroom, and who do I see? Kat. Freaking Kat. I just wanted to laugh. I mean... come on. Why? See, I'm God's hackey sack. He loves to mess with me.
The part that I found even weirder- and even frightened me a little- is that we actually talked for about 10 minutes after the class and it wasn't even awkward at all. I mean... shouldn't it be awkward? The last time I saw her, she was dumping me. There should be something a little weird about talking in that circumstance.
And as a quick aside, Carolyn and I have actually been able to talk to each other without any problem, which has helped to give me some closure I didn't know I needed. The whole thing still hurts, though. I don't heal quickly.

As someone pointed out to me, I'm a full-throttle guy. I don't hold back. I'm all the way. And because of that, I get the highest highs and the lowest lows. That's pretty much true. She recommended that I try to temper myself a bit... I just don't see how I can do that, though. I mean, it's not... not me. I don't know. I have closed my heart off again, though... I just can't take another blow again. I just can't. I know it makes Melissa mad, but it's a survival thing.

OK, something a bit happier. The basketball team opened the MAC season off last night against Akron, the preseason favorite in the conference. And let me tell you, that game was hot. The O Zone was completely packed; kids were standing in the aisles and it spilled over into the section above us. The rest of the crowd looked pretty full (the official attendance was about 5,300, but it looked more like 7k). Our props of spinwheels and giant foam bricks came in, and it was really cool to see them in action. Most of all, we were loud and active. Especially after a couple monster alley-oops by Jerome Tillman, the O Zone was as loud as I've ever heard it. The whole thing was great. I hope we keep that up all year.

And lastly, I need to say I just found out that someone very important to me was hit by her ex-boyfriend while they were dating (left a bruise one time). It made me furious, to the point that if he were nearby, I would've grabbed some sort of weapon and went to town on him. You just DO NOT DO THAT. EVER. And it bothers me just as much that she didn't feel like she could tell me or anyone else out of concern for him. It's all so wrong on so many levels. And another friend of mine is being stalked by an ex-boyfriend, which brought her to tears the other night. I don't get it. I really don't. How can guys treat women with such disrespect? What did they do to deserve it?

There's so much I cannot understand.